Saturday, October 7, 2006

Lost

Feeling Sad
Hearing James Taylor

I am feeling like I am at a major crossroads in my life and I have some serious decisions to make.

We are at a critical point on whether to proceed with any fertility stuff on the baby front. It is a very emotional decision for me and I just don’t know if I can go do the fertility stuff again. The highs and lows hormonally as well as the deep depression when another month goes by and still not pregnant. I also do not know if I can go through another miscarriage. It has been well over a year and it still decimates me sometimes. Hubby is completely content with just The Prince but I feel like Hubby and the Prince deserve more.

All this baby stuff is taking a toll on my relationship with Hubby. He tries to fix everything and there is no quick fix to any of this.

But the worst part is I feel like I have lost my way. I am trying to put God first in my life but I am feeling so alone and uninspired. I don’t know how to get back on the path that I have strayed so far from.